Grandpa

Grandpa Jokes

My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said "I inherited a watering hole." Bewildered I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?" "I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."

People say my dad left me and was never successful, but if you search up who destroyed the twin towers he will pop up. Also, my moms great grandpa killed Hitler

I was at school when i remembered i forgot my necklace then i screamed out, "SHIT I FORGOT GRANDPA."

one day little johnny saw his grandpa smoking a cigar johnny said can i have puff grandpa said can your dick touch your ass johnny said no then thats your answer later that day johnny saw his grandpa drinking a drink johnny said can i have a sip grandpa said the same thing can your dick touch your ass johnny said no then thats your answer later that night johnny was eating some cookies in the kitchin grandpa said hi son can i have a cookie johnny said can your dick touch your ass grandpa said yes johnny said good go fuck yourself

My mother was so sad after my grandpas death she went into the bathroom with my uncle and I could hear their moans of sorrow. She then surprised me later on saying that she was pregnant.

Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks... "Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"

"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."