God jokes
Race car backwards is race car, but if you turn race car sideways, that’s how Paul Walker got sent to God’s inbox.
God, I love telling children their parents love them, but only on April Fools'. They're orphans, after all.
What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler?
“Oh my god, put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”
Why don't you see black people with Down syndrome?
Because God doesn't punish someone twice.
Looking in the mirror, I don’t need a therapist, god damn, I wanna be a terrorist.
Why do orphans like to go to church?
Because they actually have a father there.
I'm treated like God when I'm home, I'm usually ignored until someone wants something.
God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.
Hitler: 👌👌👌👌
God: 😩😩😩😩
God, I miss Stephen Hawking.
He was brainier than Kurt Cobain's ceiling.
And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.”
But John came fifth, and he got a toaster.
My wife treats me like God!
She takes no notice of my existence until she wants something.
Do you want to know what gifts God gave me?
He didn't give me any.
I was made by the Devil.
What's the difference between God and Ron DeSantis?
God does not think he is Ron DeSantis.
Yep, this happens when you play G.T.A., good God!
Really gotta love all the morons who, instead of sharing irreverent dark jokes, say the stupidest shit pertaining to Christianism.
Your hairline goes so far back that even God said, "I learned about it in my days."
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
God, my dad got so pissed during 9/11.
All that work wasted.
When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.
Why is Jesus in pieces?
Because a one man band is Nine Inch Nails.