God jokes
What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler?
“Oh my god, put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”
Why do orphans like to go to church?
Because they actually have a father there.
Looking in the mirror, I don’t need a therapist, god damn, I wanna be a terrorist.
Why did God build a stairway to heaven?
So all the disabled people will have to go to hell.
I'm treated like God when I'm home, I'm usually ignored until someone wants something.
Memes
God, I love telling children their parents love them, but only on April Fools'. They're orphans, after all.
God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.
Hitler: 👌👌👌👌
God: 😩😩😩😩
And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.”
But John came fifth, and he got a toaster.
Why don't you see black people with Down syndrome?
Because God doesn't punish someone twice.
Yep, this happens when you play G.T.A., good God!
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
God, my dad got so pissed during 9/11.
All that work wasted.
Your hairline goes so far back that even God said, "I learned about it in my days."
Really gotta love all the morons who, instead of sharing irreverent dark jokes, say the stupidest shit pertaining to Christianism.
Why is Jesus in pieces?
Because a one man band is Nine Inch Nails.
Why do orphans pray to God?
So they have someone to call father.
When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.
Do you want to know what gifts God gave me?
He didn't give me any.
I was made by the Devil.
What's the difference between God and Ron DeSantis?
God does not think he is Ron DeSantis.
"My dick fell off in the shower!" suddenly a bright flash of white lights. You see God smiling at you. "Joseph, where is your wiener, little one?" He says, chuckling lightly.