Go jokes

What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."

What does Michael Jackson ask little boys before going to bed? Are you sleeping?

Everyone in my class: "I can't wait until I have a family, I can't wait to study for my dream job."

My friends: "What's your dream job?"

Me: "I'm going to die young :))"

What's an emo's favorite game?

Limbo.

(If you don't understand the joke, go look up what Limbo is.)

How do you get to the Hogwarts gym?

Go through the dumbbell door.

What do bees do when they get married?

They go on a honeymoon.

Son: Can I go to my friend's mum? Mum: No! Son: Dad was right, I am a son of a bitch! Mum: Bad news, but you're adopted!!

I was at the bar with a friend, and he said to me, "Veronica, I just stopped a rape." The bartender overheard him and had a puzzled look on his face, because he never moved. He then said, "I saw this girl walk into the bathroom, and I decided not to go."

Where do people with no legs go to have fun?

Legnoland.

I'm going to draw a picture. A picture with a twist. I'll draw it with a razor blade. I'll draw it on my wrist.

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

You make them clap until they go home.

Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?

Their parents never say yes.

Next time I'm at a restaurant, and they ask what I want to drink, I'm going to say "bleach".

A man has a terminal illness and isn't sure how long he has left to live, so he talks to his doctor. The man asks, "How long am I going to live?"

The doctor says, "Depends, what time is it?" The doctor then looks at his watch and says, "10".

The man asks, "Ten what?"

Then the doctor keeps going, "6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1".

Where do cows go on holiday? -- Moo Zealand.

You’re Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?

European.

Where do mathematicians go to die?

The symmetry.

Knock knock. Who's there? Cows go. Cows go who? No silly, cows go moo!

Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it's forbidden!

All aboard the Magic School Bus! We are going to New York. The second tower has been hit.