Girls jokes
"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.
That's what Elliot Rodger did.
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
Why do horny, deaf girls wear tight pants?
So you can read her lips.
Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.
Found this girl in Hawaii.
Put a stick up her ass and she said, "Ayi."
An eight-year-old girl struggles to breathe as she lies on a hospital bed and waits for the doctor to come. After the doctor comes, he pulls his cock out of her mouth, and she can breathe much better.
Why do teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”
– Rodney Dangerfield
A girl came to my house. She said, "Where are your parents?" I started crying.
Why does a straight guy act gay? Because he wants to feel wanted and wants to be BFFs with the hottest girls.
Q. What does a Russian girl do when she gets unexpectedly pregnant?
A. Has an abortion.
The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"
He says, "No."
She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."
Instead of the line, "This girl's on fire," my friend can relate to, "The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the f*ck out!"
I met an African girl the other night, we spoke for hours.
We just clicked.
My girlfriend called me a cocksucker, but hey, 20 dollars is 20 dollars.
Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it.
My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.
Yo mama so fat, survivors of the Titanic said a fat girl on the bow was so heavy, the ship started to sink, but when she reached the stern, the ship split.
How do you get a white girl to suck your dick?
Put ranch dressing on it.