Girl jokes

If God didn’t mean for us to have sex with 11-year-old girls, why did he make them so sexy and so much physically weaker?

Why did Joe Biden visit Hiroshima? Because the city has the hottest prepubescent girls in the world.

I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.

An emo girl jumped out of a tree at the same time a feather fell to the ground... What hit the ground first?

The feather, the girl was stopped by a rope.

I told the emo girl to stop playing fruit ninja on her wrists.

I told the emo girl that I bet she's jealous of the hanging lights in the gym.

Why did the sexy 12 year old girl with cerebral palsy get raped? Because her parents didn’t have the decency to drown her at birth.

What’s the difference between a microwave and a 10 year old girl?

The microwave doesn’t fart out blood and diarrhea when you pull your meat out.

Once when I was 6, I had a massive crush on a girl in my grade. She liked me too, and we kissed under a tree.

Next day, same spot, but now she's pregnant. That stupid dad stole my girl!

Her chest was so flat, I felt gay while hugging her.

This disabled girl started rolling after me, so I ran to the stairs.

Therapist: And what is it about this generation that bothers you?

Satan: I give them the intro tour and they just say shit like "ooo spooky lol."

Therapist: That's not so bad.

Satan: When I showed one girl the pit of everlasting flame, she sighed and said "big mood."

Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."

My penis is so polite. It stands up so girls can sit down.

I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.

A 14 year old girl finds out she is pregnant. Her: "Crap! My mom is going to kill me!"

The fetus: "lol same here."

How do you know if spaghetti is a boy or a girl? It's meatballs.

You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"

How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?

I was walking this hot girl home, then she noticed me, then the walk turned into a run.

Why can't a girl with no legs play soccer? Because she's a girl.