Get jokes

Why can't an orphan go to school? He needs a parent admission form to get in.

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked.

The Twin Towers should've known they were gonna get hit when their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"

Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.

I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.

What's brown and sticky?

A stick. Get your head out of the gutters... Jeez!

My dad went to get milk from Tesco’s.

He never came back.

What is the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair?

Cancer.

I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A's instead of getting all the D's.

How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?

Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.

"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.

That's what Elliot Rodger did.

I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.

Now I can’t get it to shut up.

A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"

She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"

He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

Why can't emos stand in chairs?

Because they never get down.

An orphan uses a family bathroom, and when he comes out, he gets told, "This is a family bathroom."

What do you get when you cross a shark and a computer? Computer bytes!

ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG

Give me freedom. Give me fire. Give me contract, Or I retire.

Jog all day, Out of UCL now. FC Barcelona, I need you now.

Villarreal defenders, They surround me. Big submarines, All around me.

I get upset. Call my agent. I want money. I’m impatient.

Why do orphans play GTA? To get wanted.

Q: Why can't orphans ever win at Yahtzee?

A: Because they can never seem to get a full house.

Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

In case they get a hole in one!