Get jokes
Me vs. the emo kid: we go to high-five a tree. I get a high five; the emo kid is left hanging.
I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.
Why couldn’t the orphan play baseball?
He couldn’t get to home base.
Why did the orphan play GTA? So he could get wanted.
Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.
What falls down the building and doesn't get up again?
An emo.
Zozo the hobo is single like a Pringle.
Single like a Pringle, and he loves Pringle's, get it?
What time is it when you get home and you walk, walk home and walk, walk home?
Why did the one-armed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
If a wizard gets robbed by a muggle, has he been muggled?
Why did the Dad cross the road?
To get the milk.
What is the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair?
Cancer.
"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.
That's what Elliot Rodger did.
I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.
Now I can’t get it to shut up.
What do you get when you cross a shark and a computer? Computer bytes!
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A's instead of getting all the D's.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick. Get your head out of the gutters... Jeez!
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
Why can't an orphan go to school? He needs a parent admission form to get in.