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How do you get 500 babies in a phone booth?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
A straw.
What's the difference between your mom and your dad? One leaves your life to go get milk, and the other cleans up after you, feeds you, and does your laundry.
What did the downs kid get on his math test??
Drool.
A boy is sitting in a dentist chair getting braces, and a dentist comes in and says, "Brace yourself!"
Hippity Hoppity, women are my property.
Bippity Boppity, get the f*ck off my property!
Get up, you lazybones!
My pen is so strong, ladies, come and get it!
A retard won a break-dancing competition. All he did was go to get a drink.
How did you get Sally into a blender?
- Without much resistance.
How do you get Sally out of a blender?
- Tortilla chips.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
How do you fit a baby in a bowl? ... A blender... and how do you get it out?
Tortilla chips.
Why didn't the Japanese guy get a high five?
Logan Paul left him hanging.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.
What’s the difference between grandma getting ran over by a reindeer, and a poor kid’s parents getting ran over by military tractors?
When grandma got ran over by a reindeer, the kids actually gave a sh*t.
Communist jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets them.
I would tell a pussy joke, but you would never get it.
If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.
A baby skunk's mother gets hit by a car, so the baby skunk doesn't know what he is.
So the baby skunk walks up to a baby bunny and asks, "What are you?" The baby bunny replies, "Well, I'm a baby bunny. What are you?" The baby skunk says, "Well, I don't know, am I a baby bunny too?"
The baby bunny says, "No, you're not a baby bunny." So the baby skunk asks, "Well, what am I then?"
The baby bunny replies, "Well, you're not exactly blank and you're not exactly white, so you must be Mexican."
Who goes to a comedian show and gets offended?
A feminist.
This is a Rickroll. The joke is that you thought you were going to get something else, but instead you got Rickrolled.