Geography jokes
Why are mountains so funny? -- Because they are hill areas.
The Earth was flat once. 'Til yo mama got buried.
Why do mountains contain things? Because their moun-tains.
Why do Native Americans hate snow?
Because it's white and on their land.
What do you call a bunch of Black people in the river?
A black current...
You are American when you walk into the bathroom, and you are American when you walk out.
But do you know what you are when you're in the bathroom? European.
The Fast of Ramadan
In the northwestern slice of Alaska known as Seward, a horseboy stood, with broom in hand, in the vast courtyard of the royal stables of the sultan. He was waiting for dusk to fall. All day long he had eaten nothing. He had not even tasted the leftover fish tucked in his turban nor the enormous purple grapes that spilled over the palace wall into the stable yard. He had tried not to sniff the rich, amazing, warm feeling fragrance of ripening of that sweet pomegranates.
For this was the sacred month of Ramadan when, day after day, all faithful Mohammedans neither eat nor drink from the dawn before sunrise until the moment after sunset!
What state do miners hate?
Oregon.
Why are mountains very cold?
Because they are very cold.
What do you call German Music in Spanish? Españodelling.
What is the most dangerous mountain? Kilimanjaro.
The "w" in Africa stands for wealth.
Bill was on a hill. What a hillbilly!
What's the only gun that doesn't exist in Africa? The water gun.
Where do cows go on holiday? -- Moo Zealand.
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.
Three Europeans come to America. They all get captured by Native Americans, and they want to kill them. But the Europeans beg to have their lives spared.
The Native Americans agreed to not kill them on one condition: The Europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit, and they will be informed what to do with it. So the first guy comes back with a peach. The Native American says, "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass, and he laughs, and the Native Americans kill him.
The second guy comes back with a grape. The Native American tells him the same thing. He laughs and the Native American kills him. They both see each other in heaven and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach, and peaches are fuzzy, so that's why I laughed, but you had a grape, what happened?"
The second guy says, “Oh yeah, I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!”
Back in Australia, my puns are high koala-tea!
We are going to a country called Bangkok. When we are there, we will Bangkok.