Why do emo kids sneak up on their Vietnamese grandfathers? Because they hope the war experience kicks in.
When there are more suicidal people, it means there are fewer suicidal people. That means there is an infinite generator of them.
How do you ground a Gen Z?
Make them go outside and socialize.
Corona be like:
Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.
*snap*
What does BLM stand for?? Biden loves millennials
At weddings, old people tell kids, "You're next!"
At funerals, little kids tell old people, "You're next!"
A man who desperately wanted to be good after serving time in prison was visited by an Angel. "You want to change? You can still enter heaven on two conditions. You must bet on the horses with any money you have and pass your winnings to someone less fortunate, and you must never hold on to any beef." The Angel then disappeared.
The man did as was told and became generous and kind. As he emerged from the betting office with all his money, he would pass every penny of it all to a deserving person each and every time.
He, however, couldn't seem to avoid meat and would still eat it no matter what.
When he died, the Angel came back for him.
"But I'm undeserving; I can't come with you," he said.
"Yes, you can," replied the Angel, "you gave all your stake (steak) away."
A father and son duo are sitting at a table, eating breakfast. The father looks at the child and says, "I'm hungry." The child looks at the father and replies, "Hi Hungry, I'm Son." The father calls his father and asks why he was named Hungry.
If an old person tells you what to do just say, "At least my parents are alive!"
In a deep village in Germany, an old man asked his granddaughter, "What are you doing?"
His granddaughter replies, "Removing Polish with chemicals."
Grandpa said, "When I was young, I did the same."
THE GRANDDAUGHTER WANTED TO SEE GRANNY. SHE KILLED HERSELF
Little Johnny says: “Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room that’s been handed down from generation to generation?” Mom replies: “Yes. What about it?” He says: “Well, the last generation just dropped it.”
What's it like to have the best daughter in the world? You'll have to ask grandma!
Ukraine be like dead children.... RUSSIA BE LIKE DEAD GENERALS!
People generalize others too much.
Hey guys, I'm back. I was grounded by my grandfather, so, yeah.
What’s the difference between a dad and a boomer age?
I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.
In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Midixadrupin, Midixarizin or Dixafix.
I heard World War 500000 in my parents'.
