What is more fun than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
Dark humor is like cancer; it's funnier when kids get it.
Why do you never play a game of cards in the jungle? Because there are cheetahs!
Went to my friend's house, fucked his sister.
I had a fun funeral / birthday.
Why aren't orphans good at Monopoly?
They don't know what a house is.
It's always fun to take anti-depressants, you either choose to take one, or the whole bottle.
Viagra is a lot like amusement parks...
It's a one hour wait, for a two-minute ride.
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."
What’s the difference between your sister and a bowling ball?
I can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!
What is an orphan's favorite game? Sims, so they can make a family to have.
You look nice, and you seem like good fun, so if I give you this flower, will you finger my bum?
I’d make fun of transgender women, but that’s low hanging fruit.
"This isn't the first time my husband's cheated on me, but you're my sister! You'd better have a better explanation than this magic lamp."
"You know how you have to be specific making wishes? Well, I was really horny and asked the genie to have the world's biggest penis....ended up with a concert pianist that's seven foot tall. Nice guy. Next time I tried, I asked for the world's biggest cock, that was fun but the poor rooster died. So I asked for the world's biggest dick and that's how I ended up on top of your husband."
What's the difference between a girl and a toy? There is no difference because you play with both anyway.
Girl: Hey.
Orphan: Hi.
Girl: Wanna be friends?
Orphan: Sure.
Girl: Ok, and go ask your parents if we can have a sleep over.
Fun fact: The body positivity movement is the only movement without any actual movement.
Don't make fun of fat people. They already have a lot on their plate.
One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.
Singing in the shower is fun, until you get soap in your mouth.
Then it's a soap opera.
While I was out shopping, I tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me. For fun, I said, "Sorry! It's been a while since I've possessed a body." She looked horrified.
Dads are like boomerangs... I hope!
Son: Dad, why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes.
You won't eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won't eat a person.
