Fruit jokes
An apple walked into the clinic.
The doctor asked what his favorite color was.
The apple said "red." :)
Why do apple trees like emo kids?
Because they like to play yoyo with them.
Why did the sick juice tree go to the hospital? Because it needed lemin-ade (not the cool type of sick, the one where you are in the hospital). Lemin-ade 1st ade.
What’s brown, fuzzy, and wears sunglasses?
A coconut on vacation.
What did the tomato say to the other tomato?
What's the difference between an apple and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
Do you know Ligma?
Have fun rubbing those balls in your tomatoes!
What do you call a burning orphan in a wheelchair? Hot Wheels.
What hit the ground first, the orphan or the apple? The apple. The orphan never hit the ground.
How is the world's fattest avocado called?
Niko
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What do emo kids and bananas have in common?
They both hang on trees.
What do you give a sick lemon?
A lemon-aid.
What is a fruit's favorite way to call someone?
WhatsApple.
What do you call getting assaulted by a gay man? Fruit punch.
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?
What is an orphan and an apple?
They get picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple actually gets picked.
What's yellow, slimy, and smells like bananas?
Monkey puke.
Why are orphans different from apples?
Apples get picked.
If you get an apple a day, what does it give you?
Worms and rotten fruit.