Fruit jokes
What do you call getting assaulted by a gay man? Fruit punch.
An apple walked into the clinic.
The doctor asked what his favorite color was.
The apple said "red." :)
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple actually gets picked.
What's yellow, slimy, and smells like bananas?
Monkey puke.
Do you know Ligma?
Have fun rubbing those balls in your tomatoes!
What did the tomato say to the other tomato?
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What is an orphan and an apple?
They get picked.
Why are orphans different from apples?
Apples get picked.
If you get an apple a day, what does it give you?
Worms and rotten fruit.
What is a fruit's favorite way to call someone?
WhatsApple.
What is an orange?
World's only not rhyming thing. Hehhhehehehehhe.
When I am getting bored, I hold a banana and start shaking it suddenly. It gives out juice after a few minutes. I get excited. Ohhhhhh!
Try with a cucumber.
What do you call an appetite including apples? Appletite.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because she felt peely!
What is black and white and red all over? A newspaper.
What do you get when you mix an apple with water... applesauce. Wait, do not leave yet. If you are still reading this, you have been rekt, ha ha. At least I am still laughing.
What do you call a bruised banana?
A school bus full of his kids.
What do you call a banana that can dance?
CHUPAPIMUNYANYO BUISNESS [sic]
Q: Why did the boy not eat the banana?
A: He was scared the juice might come out.