Fruit jokes
You wanna know what I have in common with an apple?
We BOTH look good hanging in a tree.
What's the difference between a grape and an elephant?
I don't know, what?
They are both purple except for the elephant.
I "onerie," or however you spell it, I like to replace all romance or similar memes with duck memes. Just comment duck memes there and change Valentine's Day to Duck Day. Also, for the joke:
Why did the duck walk up to the lemonade stand?
Because he wanted grapes.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lemon.
Haha! Hahahah! Hahahaah!
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree? The apples get picked.
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.
I was watching Avengers and I thought I saw a grape, but it was just Thanos.
What does a baby banana call her mum? Na na, get it? Instead of ma ma.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked. Lel. I hope you guys like this joke.
My cousin is a surgeon.
Last year he botched a surgery he was doing on a patient who happened to be gay. He's being sued for malpractice for turning a fruit into a vegetable.
What’s brown, fuzzy, and wears sunglasses?
A coconut on vacation.
Why do apple trees like emo kids?
Because they like to play yoyo with them.
Why did the sick juice tree go to the hospital? Because it needed lemin-ade (not the cool type of sick, the one where you are in the hospital). Lemin-ade 1st ade.
What do you call a burning orphan in a wheelchair? Hot Wheels.
What hit the ground first, the orphan or the apple? The apple. The orphan never hit the ground.
How is the world's fattest avocado called?
Niko
What's the difference between an apple and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What do emo kids and bananas have in common?
They both hang on trees.
What do you give a sick lemon?
A lemon-aid.
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?