Jon said:What do you call a pregnant woman? Mike said: I don’t know what? Jon said: kinder surprise
I was on the Oregon trail with my friend's brother carl. he got cholera, so we threw him off the wagon. when we came back, he was having a seizure and pooping uncontrollably. it was pretty cholerious.
two men are hunting. one asks: did you ever hunt bear? the other one answers: no, but one time i went fishing in my shorts
I'm not racist, my best friends are black for halloween. :)
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Me: I got kicked out of the library the other day Friend: why? Me: because i put the women rights book in the fiction section
My friend told me my wrist wasn't a cutting board. So I asked her if hers was at all and If i could borrow it.
Hey, I know this is a classic joke but I found it pretty funny!
"My name is 4, four like the number", my friend - "What, was 1 2 3 taken?"
I can even with it but I was bored and decided to share this x
your hairline is so bad even your gay friend is straighter then it.
Little Johnny ran into the kitchen and asked his mother "Mom can little girls have babies " his mom answered "of course not" a few minutes later his mom heard him shout to his friend "it's okay we can keep playing
Remember what one of my gay friends told me: it's only cannibalism if you swallow.
Why should you be friends with emo's? Because you get to scan their bar code for 20% off and when it expires they get rid of themselvs.
My friend group is pretty diverse. I'm Japanese, one friend is Filipino, one is American, one is Italian, and the last one is German.
Out of everyone in the friend group, the Filipino and the American were the quickest to feel uncomfortable when I asked, "Who wants to go on a march with me?"
My best friend is transgender; she transitioned from a man into a woman. I think it's courageous of her to take a pay cut like that.
A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, "now were not even allowed to do that."
What did one deperesed kid say to the other? Hey wanna hang together.
Friend: UR LIT BRO!!
Me: Thats what my sleeve said to my arm
I was in the mood for some dark meat so I called my black friend.
I once had an emo friend doing a course for the marines. He made the cut.
Once I tried to tell my friend a joke about dead people... but it went six feet underground...
