French jokes

Knock, knock? Who's there? French. French who? French fries!

What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?

I guess that’s a wrap!

In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"

In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"

Why should you never tell your French doctor that you bite your tongue?

Because your French doctor will give you a tetanus shot.

Three people explored the jungles, one was from France, one from Britain, and the other from America.

While exploring, they were captured by the tribe living there. The tribesmen told the three, "You three have invaded our territory, so we must kill you and use your bodies to create canoes. However, we aren't that heartless, so we'll let you choose your deaths."

So the French guy asked for a gun, pointed to his head, and said "Viva la France!" and shot himself. The Britain guy requested poison and said, "For the Queen!" and drank the poison. Lastly, the American asked for a spoon. The tribesmen were confused but still gave him the spoon. When the American got the spoon, he started stabbing himself, "Try make a canoe out of this one!"

What do you call a baby potato?

Small fry!

What do French ducks say?

Quoi quoi.

You know how in Pinocchio the French puppets have the thigh rings?

Well, I got them too! Only red and thinner.

I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:

The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"

The average French car has 7 gears, 6 of which are in reverse mode just in case the Germans come back.

Why are french fries rude?

Every culture has weird food.

Australians eat vegemite. The British eat haggis. The French eat snails. The Chinese eat dogs. The Americans eat their young siblings' private parts.

Why do French people eat snails?

Because they don’t like fast food.

There are only 2 things I hate in this world:

1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.

French fries weren't originally cooked in France. They were cooked in Greece.

Are you French? Because I Eiffel for you.

What did the captured Germans say to the French in WW1?

"Verdun for."

What does a French guy say when he falls off?

Oh no, Eiffel!

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast any time," so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.

— Steven Wright

What do frogs eat?

French fries!