Food jokes

Why is it wrong to put a beef or turkey patty in a burger?

'Cause it's a ham-burger, isn't it?

I saw a cat. It said, "Raisin" when he saw a nut. Hahaha, I am a crappy joker. Put me in the nerd club.

What do you call a fish with no tail? A one-eyed grape.

What do you call a broccoli 🥦 when it’s a ghost?

Cauliflower!

Why was the tamale in the hospital? Because he was a "tamalito."

Apple

Apple

Apple

Apple

Apple

Orange you glad I didn't say apple again?

What do you call a taco in bed?

Es(tá co)stado.

What do you get if you add "ER" onto Hamburg?

Hamburg-ER.

I find bananas very appeeling.

Your mom is so fat that she thought Eminem is a candy.

What starts with S and ends with S? STUPID HOMEWORK NEVER ENDS.

What starts with C and ends with K? Children do not cook.

What did you think I was going to say? How bold of you to assume.

What do you think fish tasted like before women started swimming?

"What do you want to eat?"

"You choose."

"Children."

"What?"

*Picks up pot*

"You said anything!"

I still can’t forget that tiny little dead fish in my blue lunchbox.

Getting a book on pasta?

Yes. Just imagine the pastabilities there are!

What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?

A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from Kernel Sanders.

Hehehe

Today I saw my son lick out a tub of butter. I told him to make a sandwich without butter for a week (as a punishment). He said, "Okay," and licked the bread. "It's really easy to spread," he said. LOL!

If I busted an egg on your head.... the yolk would be on you... ha ha ha!!!

What did the squash say to the tomato?

Ketchup!