Food jokes
The best part of working at an orphanage is you can give them family-size chips.
Eating a clock is so time-consuming.
U u u u u u I haveggdvk hey apple.
If you were a fruit, you would be a fineapple.
If you were a vegetable, I would visit you in the hospital.
How come Mr. Squirrel watches porn sometimes?
Sometimes he feels like a nut, sometimes he don't.
Memes
Anyone want a free pizza? Because you liking a pizza with toppings that not many people enjoy allows you to eat the entire guilt free pizza, that they said they didn't want and everyone already offered you a slice of.
"HEY THAT’S MY MILK!"
I like...
Wendy's.
"Wendeez nuts in your mouth."
Two muffins are in an oven.
One says, "Man, it is hot in here!"
The other one says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"
One day, a lady and her husband were talking and it was time for dinner. He got up and sat at the dining room table, and the lady brought the plate of food in and she sat it down in front of him. "What's this?" he said. The lady said, "A piece of shit...honey! Want some water to drink?"
What do gay people call fighting? It can't be beef, so...
Carrots?
Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."
At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, “That’s the fourth time you’ve gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn’t it embarrass you?”
“Why should it?” answered her spouse. “I keep telling them it’s for you.”
What do you call a cow who's personality is down to Earth?
Ground beef.
What do you call a sleeping cow?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow that fell up the stairs?
Ground beef.
What is Meat Loaf's new name now that he has passed?
Ground beef.
Why did McDonald’s kill somebody because they stole the 12-piece nuggets that will never be seen because of them!
Hey paps, BONE-appetit!
(Just eat your spaguetti.)
"Mayotte’s are sinking in the yogurt! (My Oat’s)" 🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹