Food jokes
What do cannibals call a person that is running?
Fast food.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground meat.
What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
Banana na na.
What do you call Dominos when it doesn't know how to cook pizza?
Domi-don't-knows...
What do you call the ghost of the Thanksgiving turkey? A Poultrygeist.
If I look after chickens, does that make me a chicken tender?
What does a news anchor cow say for the weekly broadcast?
"Here's the beef of the week!"
What do you get when you eat a hamburger?
Mustard gas.
I love eggs!
Why was the peanut butter upset at his retirement party?
He was roasted.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
I-I-I-I-I-I keep on hopin' we'll eat cake by the ocean, uh!
What's the difference between a hooker and a burrito?
I don't eat burritos.
What do an orphan and an apple not have in common?
The apple actually gets picked.
Parents are like food—not all kids get them.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
What flour do orphans use whilst making cakes? Self-raising.
Shorts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin. When it's sniff, stick it in. It goes in dry and comes out wet, And the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag.
It's not what you think it is. It's a Lipton tea bag.
Get your mind together!
Why did the orphan start crying?
Because his apple found a home in his stomach.