Food jokes
How do you find out about the accomplishments of the former president of the United States James Earl Carter?
Read the label on the jar of Skippy peanut butter.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop!
Just think, when we're getting fucked, we make our own food.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
What do you get if you eat sugar?
High.
Memes
A kid is trick-or-treating. He knocks on a door. Then someone opens the door and the kid said, "HI, I'M THE WICKED WIENER!"
What is the best way to end a cookbook?
And that’s a wrap!
Why was the dog staying in the shade?
Because it didn't want to be a hot dog!
What type of flour do orphans use to bake with...? Self-raising flour!
Yesterday I made food using oil--olive oil.
(I love oil!)
What's big, round, and can't move?
A vegetable!
For every orphan, a bag of chips is family size.
Have you heard about the new cereal?
It's called "Prostituties."
They don't snap, crackle, or pop, but they sure do bang!
Why do women love Chinese food? Because WON TON spelled backward is NOT NOW!
Why is the orange 🍊 the fastest fruit?
Because it never runs out of juice.
"Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.
People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.
Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!
Your mama's so fat, she runs a trade deficit with food!
Want my cookie? Come and get it... 😭
Q. What's the difference between an Alzheimer's patient and a tomato? A. A tomato isn't a vegetable.