Food jokes
I would kill for something to eat--the cannibal.
Why did the tamale go to the hospital?
because estava malito :)
What’s the difference between a bird and a human?
“We don’t eat with our peckers.”
Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.
About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"
Where do you take your pig to karate?
The pork chop class!
How do you eat a meat?
You steak it in your mouth.
What's green and smells like bacon?
Kermit the frog's finger.
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A pork chop.
What did the skeleton say after dinner?
Bon appétit!
What’s the difference between a baby and a beet? Beets stain your teeth.
What did one alligator say to the other alligator?
"Let’s go for an all-in-one buffet!"
What do you call a skinny black dick? A Tootsie Roll.
This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.
His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.
The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.
Broccoli is like anal sex. If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.
I made a bet with my friend that I couldn’t create a working car with spaghetti.
You should have seen her face when I drove pasta! 😂
What is the spiciest meat ever? Pepperoni.
There was a race between Lettuce, a faucet, and Ketchup. The lettuce was a-head, the faucet was still running, and the ketchup was trying to ketchup.
I had a joke about pizza, it's just too cheesy.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream cone?
Cuz he got hit by a bus while crossing the street.
What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.