Food jokes
What did the customer say when Beef a Roo made him a bacon cheeseburger?
Thank a Roo.
What’s Steven Hawking's favorite crisps brand?
Walkers.
What did the mouse 🐭 say when his friend broke their teeth?
Hard cheese! 🧀😂
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
"Breathe... Breathe..."
What is a fish’s 🐟 favorite game?
Salmon Says!
He jizzes canned cheese.
Why does the ice cream have so many friends?
Because he’s cool.
What did the cow say to the fat pig?
Moooooooove over!
Burger King got Dairy Queen pregnant during sex, cause he forgot to wrap his Whopper.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Orange." "Orange who?" "Orange you coming?"
Why wouldn’t Mrs. Grapes leave her children behind?
Because she loves raisin kids.
Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons.
American: "I won't ever see my dog again!"
Italian: "I won't ever make pizzas again!"
German: "Hey, granddad, how have you been?"
What did the cookie say when he jumped off the cliff? Crumbs, ha ha!
What do you call a pig in the mud?
A Ky hot brown.
Why is the orange 🍊 the fastest fruit?
Because it never runs out of juice.
Why don't feminists like to eat hotdogs? Because they remind them of men's dicks.
Why did the boy put the potatoes 🥔 on the kitchen floor?
He wanted to mash potatoes!
Vegetarian: I prefer plants.
Herbivore: I just like food.
Cannibal: I'm a people person.
What did the baker say when he forgot the cookie sheets?
Ooh, snickerdoodles!
There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump.
She really hates it when I spit my food back out.