Food jokes
Why is a ketchup bottle like a kid? Cause they're like, "Squirt!" (squirt ketchup).
How is your cereal? Oh, wait.
Me: Can you give me some drumsticks to eat?
Brother: Why though?
Me: So I can just drum up an appetite.
Why did the cow have for breakfast?
Answer: Muesli.
Jesus is what he eats!
Shit!
What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"
Ass cream.
What do lesbians cook for dinner?
They don't, they just eat out.
OK, OK, eat your shirt.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
Why can’t organs have a family bag of chips?
Because they have no family to share it with.
Yo momma so fat, her ankle broke and gravy poured out.
What does a chicken give you?
Student: Meat.
What does a pig give you?
Student: Bacon.
What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework.
A nut told me to eat him, so I did, but something weird happened. I turned into a nut, and when I poop, there were eggs there.
💔 The Broken Family 💔 . Part 1
Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.
Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)
Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.
Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)
Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.
Mom: But what he did was wrong.
Girl: I know.
(SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)
Mom: Is that ur dad.
Girl: Yes Mom
Comment Part 2
What do plus a nut and a pee make?
Pee-nuts.
Kaas.
What do you call a chicken staring at a pile of lettuce?
A chicken sees a salad.
(Say it out loud if you don't get it!)
What egg do you buy an orphan?
Free range.