Food

Food jokes

Chef

  • A chef named his chicken Richard and named a rooster Ballz. A guy walks up and asks the chef what he's cooking. He replies, "My dick and balls."

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    People

  • When I'm bored, I go into an elevator with a full duffle bag. Once people come in and the door closes, I zip open the bag a little bit and whisper to it, "I'll get you some food once we get off."

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    Mama

  • Yo mama so fat, when she ate one cheeseburger, she pooped it out immediately because her butt was too big.

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    People

  • Fat people: Do I look beautiful when I eat a pack of chicken?

    Me: Yes, you look like a bunch of boulders crashing into each other.

    Fat: Dang...

    Me: Shut up, Jon Brower Minnoch.

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    Dog

  • I was crying while my dad was cutting onions in the kitchen. Onions was such a good dog.

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    Cookie

  • Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because she was crummy.

    What did the toilet say to the other toilet? You look flushed.

    What has 1 head, 1 foot, and 4 legs? A bed.