My friend and I were walking down the street, and we saw this one disabled kid getting bullied by three other kids. Urgently, we sprinted over to help. He had no chance against the five of us.
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid.
Man: "Hang in there! I'm gonna get some help!"
Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said.
RIP Daniel Kyre from Cyndago (July 6, 1994-September 18, 2015)
Daniel committed suicide five years ago today......
So there was this kid being bullied by four other kids. I decided to step in.
He didn’t stand a chance against the five of us.
I gave a tree a high five, but sadly it left me hanging.
Why can't orphans have a five-star GTA because they're not wanted?
Q: What did the cannibal shout when his friend fell on the floor?
A: "FIVE SECOND RULE!"
A Roman walks into a bar.
He holds up two fingers and says, "Give me five beers."
Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don't have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan: he tells his friend, "We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks. But then when the bill comes, you get down and suck on the hot-dog, and it'll look like you're sucking on my dick. So then we'll get thrown out without paying, and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again."
His friend agrees, so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude's pants, go to the bar, and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, "Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!" The first guy says, "Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!"
Why didn't Logan Paul high five the Asian man? Because he loves to leave Asians hanging.
What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Five Guys.
I saw an emo orphan by a tree, and I was going to give it a high-five, but instead I just let it hang.
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
Question: What happened to the depressed kid who tried to high five a tree?
Answer: He was left hanging.
A guy and girl had a sex poem competition.
Guy: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I can put mine in yours, but you can't put yours in mine."
Girl: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I know the length of yours, but you won't know the depth of mine."
A depressed kid wanted to give me a high five.
I just left him hanging.
Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!
A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.
What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.
Me: I named my dog Five Miles so I can tell people I walk five miles every day.
Old man: I ran over five miles today.
I named my dog "5 miles" so I could say I ran five miles today. I ran over 5 miles.
Why didn't the Japanese guy get a high five?
Logan Paul left him hanging.
My father left me at a young age.
He was only five.
