Score jokes
"Hotel Rwanda" has a high score on Rotten Tomatoes, but their Yelp reviews are terrible.
Did you hear the score in the Egypt vs Ethiopia football game? Egypt 8, Ethiopia didn't.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
What was the score of the basketball game in Africa?
Eight-nothing.
I scored.
I think
My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.
Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!
That's the best I've done so far.
Once I went to watch a match in Portugal. It was between Penaldo and his kids. The referee was Georgiana (his wife). Mpaypal and Igayspeed were also there. The match began, and his kids scored two goals in the first 10 minutes. Then, when the match was about to end, Penaldo got angry and asked his wife for penalties. His wife declined, and he tortured and beat her up and took 10 penalties (missed 7 of them) but won 3-2. Shame on you, Penaldo! 😡😡😡
What happens when an emo kid loses a Kahoot? He gets a 25 kill streak.
Why is the thief so good at basketball? Because he can shoot, steal, and run.
Teacher: "I'm sorry, but you got a 74 on the test."
Quiet Kid: "I'll show you my own 74."
Classroom: *visible panic*
Did you hear the scores of the African basketball game?
It was Eight-Nothing.
Me: brags about my 30 kill streak.
The jury: O.o
Rainbows top the class, as they always score with flying colors.
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
They never get love.
Water was found on Mars.
Mars: 1 Africa: 0
Who are the best at bowling?
Terrorists, they always throw strikes.
Why is basketball such a messy sport?
'Cause the players are always dribbling everywhere!
The wheelchair kid laughed at my test score, so I told him to stand up to the anthem.
Why can't an orphan get 5 stars in GTA? Because they are not wanted.
A black n***a crashes a neighborhood barbecue, bragging about his 'hood credentials' while hogging all the ribs and collard greens. The host calls him out, 'Yo, pay up or get out. Ain't no freebies here.' He laughs it off, 'Man, I run this block!' But the host's burly brother, who's been grilling the whole time, snarls, 'Wrong, fool. Time to settle the score.' He pins him against the picnic table, wraps a chain leash around his neck from the dog run, edges him with a vibrating basting brush slathered in hot sauce, and then plows his ass deep and hard, grunting, 'Now you're the main course, spicier than the jerk chicken!'