Knock knock.
Who's there?
Insomnia.
You'll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that... Well now I can't cry myself to sleep anymore...
Fitness Jokes
Suzy: How did Jonah fit in the whale?
Teacher: Whales are very big but have small mouths, so Jonah did not actually fit in the whale.
Suzy: Well, the Bible says he did.
Teacher: He did not.
Suzy: When I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in.
Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven? Maybe he went to hell.
Suzy: Then you can ask him.
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
What do squats eat? Numbers.
Hey, Tanya, can I Tanya ass?
how do you fit 4 gay guys on a stool?
you flip it over.
What is white, black, and red and can't fit through a revolving door?
A nun with a spear through her head!
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
Why isn't the athlete in the full bus? Because she is trying to fit in.
How do chickens 🐔 get stronger and stronger?
They egg-xercise every day!
What time is it when you get home and you can walk walk home and walk walk?
How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?
Simple. All in the ashtray.
Yo mama so hot, she can fit in a mug.
I tried to make vegetable soup today, but the wheelchair didn't fit in the pot.
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
What is Jesus's favorite exercise?
Cross Fit.
A is for Amy who fell down the stairs.
B is for Basil assaulted by bears.
C is for Clara who wasted away.
D is for Desmond thrown out of a sleigh.
E is for Ernest who choked on a peach.
F is for Fanny sucked dry by a leech.
G is for George smothered under a rug.
H is for Hector done in by a thug.
I is for Ida who drowned in a lake.
J is for James who took lye by mistake.
K is for Kate who was struck with an axe.
L is for Leo who swallowed some tacks.
M is for Maud who was swept out to sea.
N is for Neville who died of ennui.
O is for Olive run through with an awl.
P is for Prue trampled flat in a brawl.
Q is for Quentin who sank in a mire.
R is for Rhoda consumed by a fire.
S is for Susan who perished of fits.
T is for Titus who flew into bits.
U is for Una who slipped down a drain.
V is for Victor squashed under a train.
W is for Winnie embedded in ice.
X is for Xerxes devoured by mice.
Y is for Yorick whose head was knocked in.
Z is for Zillah who drank too much gin.
Total gym.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Willis.
Willis who?
Willis dick fit in yo mouth?!
