Firearm jokes
What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?
The final countdown.
Why did the cow steal an AK-47?
He was a mooslim.
I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?
Kurt Cobain's microphone.
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun. Now it’s an assault rifle.
How many guns can an octopus hold?
9
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair with a gun? RG-XD
Me and my friend were hunting ducks. He had a 12 gauge shotgun, and he looked over and I had a .50 caliber machine gun. He said, "You're crazy!" I responded, "Quackers."
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
DONE🔫
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.
I took a special needs child to a shooting range.
Poor bastard had no idea which direction to run in.
I got a lot running through my head right now. I wish at least one was a 12-gauge round.
In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.
And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"
Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.
This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook. All they wanted was books, but got magazines instead.
My friend was a victim of a school shooting once, but he couldn't tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his AR.
I was walking in the forest with my gf.
I had a Desert Eagle for protection.
A bear jumped out of the bushes; one shot was enough to put my gf down, and it gave me enough time to run away.
What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?
Special forces.
Btw, I'm 13.
What happened when the gun dealer found his pistol in his shoe?
He found that he had a piece in his sole!