Fight Jokes

Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, im hit! I think I've lost an electron! Are you sure? Asks the other. Im positive!

This one as actually physics(unlike some other joke here, ahem cough cough)

One weekend some distant family members that I hadn't met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn't met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).

My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes, and told me they both ended up dying.

Well, SO-RRY but I didnt know they're conjoined twins.

When I was young I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back. Except they didn't get back up.

Hey~ How ya doin'?~ Well I'm doin' just fine~ I lied~ I'm DEAD inside~ Don't~ Tell me 'it's gonna be alright'~ I've tried, but I can't fight like this~ Hey how ya doin', I'm tired but I'm trying to fight~

Jesus saved me from eternal fate. But I didn't want to get saved I was about to fight Satan on Final Destination before facing and kicking God's ass.

My mom told me a joke about boxing. I guess I missed the punch line.

Why couldnt proffessor xavier fight magneto? because he couldnt stand up for himself

so i saw two homeless people on the road fight i said stop fighting and go home i gess it was a little insensitive

This Anorexic girl wanted to fight me I told her that I would roast her but she didn't have any meat

why are we still fighting in darkness

mission failed soldier we will get em next time

I'm the champion of this site I fight with the ten rings and ten fists of the legendary buddah.

Now for my joke... Why does Peter pan always fly? Because he neverlands..

God those orphans we're putting up such a fight, I had to lock em in the basement

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?

he says "take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.

What's the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight?

When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren't at a UFC event, you're watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.

Health feed fights grand gucxsrdcjcgfdz taxicab heaven reflection during harvesting

My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tryed to fight me so i said: IF you wanna fight me ill run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs ill already be down the stairs waiting and he started crying