Fight jokes

So, some ants in a colony go to war. They want some more troops and know that there are ants that went to wars as well. They call them war-ants.

They start barging into homes to search for more war-ants. They barge into a home, and the lady-ant goes, "Hey, why are you here? Can you please leave?" One of the ants replies with, "I'm sorry, but unless you have a war-ant, we have to keep searching your house."

Little Johnny was getting beaten up by two kids, so I came and helped.

He won’t stand against the three of us!

If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be "Alien vs Predator"?

The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.

Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.

Alien vs Predator.

Cosby vs E.T.

I’ve just discovered that cock fighting is done with chickens.

12 months of training completely wasted.

He was in a fight, then a person said, "Stand up for yourself!"

Why shouldn't you get in a fight with a dinosaur?

You'll get jur ass kicked.

Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:

Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂

Elderly man: Can I get a discount, please? I fought in World War 2.

Cashier: Sure!

Elderly man: Danke.

Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!

If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?

Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?

Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.

I saw two blind men fighting at the mall. I yelled, "He has a gun!" They both ran.

Fight in the comments.

Chuck Norris can toss Jupiter at the Sun with his bare hands.

And he still cannot win a fighting match against Bruce Lee.

We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:

1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.

2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.

3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).

Why did Muhammad Ali go down? Because he couldn't stand the cancer.

"Our all-transgender brigade has suffered heavy casualties!"

"What? We haven’t even sent them to fight!"

"They’ve already lost 30% of the unit!"