A brunette fought and didn't get raped.
A blonde thought and did get raped.
What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"
Little Johnny was getting beaten up by two kids, so I came and helped.
He won’t stand against the three of us!
If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be "Alien vs Predator"?
The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.
Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.
Alien vs Predator.
Cosby vs E.T.
I saw two blind men fighting at the mall. I yelled, "He has a gun!" They both ran.
Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?
Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.
Why shouldn't you get in a fight with a dinosaur?
You'll get jur ass kicked.
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!
Elderly man: Can I get a discount, please? I fought in World War 2.
Cashier: Sure!
Elderly man: Danke.
He was in a fight, then a person said, "Stand up for yourself!"
Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!
Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:
Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂
If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?
How do you get two deaf people from fighting?
Turn off the lights and walk out.
Why did Muhammad Ali go down? Because he couldn't stand the cancer.
"Our all-transgender brigade has suffered heavy casualties!"
"What? We haven’t even sent them to fight!"
"They’ve already lost 30% of the unit!"
We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:
1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.
2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.
3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).
I asked a person in a wheelchair if they wanted to fight. All I had to do is say, "Stand up!"
