Fear jokes
Why was 10 afraid?
Because he was in the middle of 9 and 11.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because seven ate nine.
But 10 was afraid, why? Because it was in between 9 and 11.
Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.
Why is ten afraid? Because he’s in between nine and eleven.
Why was the rapper afraid of ghosts?
Because they kept booing him off stage!
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
Why didn’t the pecan go to the ballet?
It was afraid of the nutcracker.
I put a guy in a fridge. He said, "I had a nightmare!"
What do you call someone who’s afraid of breaststroke? Chicken breast.
Yo mama so scary that the monsters have to look under the bed for her.
Yo mama so ugly that the monsters thought that she was their mother.
Why are New Yorkers scared of airplanes?
Yo mama so ugly that she gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
I hate nightmares.
You was reaching into you’re backpack and the whole class jumped through the window.
Why was ten scared?
It was in the middle of 9/11.
I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!
I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!
So, I remember growing my own peanuts really well. There's one that's larger than the others. I can't keep my eye off of it.
I'm scared that it moves at night.
I'm being serious. I literally can't keep my eye off it.
"Since 7 8 9, why was 10 scared? Because it was in between 9 and 1."
Why can't ghosts stay happy? Because they are too skeletal.
I'm never going bungee jumping because a cord bridged me into the world. It's not taking me out.
Once, there was a woman who had a husband and a dog. The husband dies.
The dog would always sleep under the bed, and when the woman would go to sleep, she'd put her hand down, and the dog would lick it to say she/he was alright. One night, it was thunderstorming. She put her hand down and the dog licked normally. She heard the dog whimper, so she put her hand down like normal, as the dog always does, he/she licks her hand.
Then she heard dripping coming from the bathroom, so she went to go stop the leaking that might be coming from the tap, but the tap wasn't on, nor was it dripping. She turns on the light and looks up at the roof to see if the roof was leaking but turns out her dog was hung by its head above the bathtub.
On the mirror it said, "Humans can lick too," in the dog's blood.
This is a true story, don't be afraid to look it up!