Favourite jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cow.
Cow who?
Cow don't go who, they go moo!
What's a snake's favorite subject?
Well, there are two: hisss-tory, but some prefer maths; those weirdos are adders.
What is Jack Frost's favorite mode of transport?
A Tri-cycle.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite movie?
Black and white.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite type of basketball?
Dribble.
Saint Nicholas is the patron saint of working girls. Call girls. Hookers. Prostitutes. And the association is a long one, going back to the very earliest legends which place St. Nick as a Greek bishop in Myra, Lycia in what is now the Turkish Mediterranean - three centuries after Christ.
Saint Nicholas is notable primarily for giving secretly to the poor, and supposedly the first to benefit were three young ladies whose poor father couldn't afford wedding or dowry to marry them off - destining them instead to a life of prostitution. St. Nick supposedly threw a bag of gold through the window to pay for the wedding but, by the third attempt, the poor father was watching to determine the identity of the anonymous benefactor. Santa outsmarted him by dropping the last bag of coins down the chimney.
So, whenever you see Santa, he always travels with his three favourite sex workers - who seemingly never grow old. On a quiet, still Christmas night you can even hear him call them.
Ho! Ho! Ho! And to all a good night.
What is a nonce's favorite toy...? You.
What starts with "M" and ends in "arrige" and is a man's favorite thing?
Miscarriage, this joke never gets old, just like the baby.
What is Sophia’s favourite song?
"Open Wide" cum inside, it is okay school.
What is a vampire's favorite animal? A giraffe.
What is a vampire's favorite fruit? Neck-tarines.
Those two jokes are not funny at all!
What's an emo's favorite part about being dunked?
The hangover.
What's the autistic kid's favorite song? Yours.
What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!
What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!
What is an Emo's favorite movie?
"Suicide Squad."
What’s an orphan's favorite game?
Catch.
What is a Jedi's favorite Italian dessert?
Obi-Wan Cannoli.
Stephen Hawking and his wife Siri’s favorite place to eat is Meals on Wheels!
What is cats and dogs' favorite story and movie?
"Romeow and Drooliet!"
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang, because it came back unlike their parents.
What do an emo girl and a blind girl have in common?
Black is their favorite color.