Family jokes
What can orphans not get when playing a sport?
A home run!
What do you call an orphan with no relatives?
An orphan with no relatives.
Why do orphans like playing tennis so much?
Because it’s the only way they’ll ever get love.
"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "You're." "You're who?" "You're parents left you."
One time I saw a kid crying, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working at an orphanage!
My dad went to go get milk.
My little sister that is 10 is so ugly her hairline can't even be found by Dora the Explorer.
Roses are red, violets are blue, it's really no wonder your mama left you!
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
Mom! Mom! The class called me an orphan.
Why do orphans love violent video games like GTA?
They never had parents to protect them from it.
Simpsons.
Meet the Simpsons.
They're the greatest modern family.
From the town of Springfield.
They're a page right out of history.
What games do orphans hate?
Bingo.
My bully: Your face is ugly.
Me: Yeah well your mom is so fat she broke the stairway to heaven.
My bully: :(
I'm thinking about telling my daughter there's a ghost in the house. At least then I can wear a bed sheet at night and fuck her without her being suspicious.
An orphan goes to a family restaurant with her doll.
"I'm sorry but you can't be here," said the man. "This is a family restaurant." The orphan said, "This is my family," then pointed to her doll.
Why did the orphan not get service at the restaurant?
Because it was a family restaurant!
My mom told me to clean the sink, but I couldn’t find you.
An orphan is at a barbecue and is getting food. A man asks him if he wants steak or phan I ment ham.
Girl, come here, my parents aren't home.
Orphan: Mine are never.