Family jokes
What do you call an autistic daughter?
Yo momma!
What's an orphan's least favorite store to go to?
Home Depot.
Why can’t an orphan go on a field trip?
'Cause they need a parent's signature.
Why can't an orphan role-play Star Wars?
Because they have no one to play Darth Vader.
Memes
Yo momma's so fat that she got married to diabetes!
Why can’t orphans eat at a family restaurant? Because they don’t have a mom or dad.
Teacher: Students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house.
Student one orphan: I don't have any.
Student 2: What is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner?
Student one orphan: What!
Student 2: The prisoner gets picked.
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
Why are orphans so scared of the dark?
The dad can't check the closet for them.
Brother: Your nuts!
Sister: What do you mean? You're the one that has the nuts!
I ate all of your mommy's orphans.
I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.
Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was and pointed to me. I pushed him out of the car, and my other boyfriend took the front seat.
I bet when your mom first saw you, she said, "Oh my god, this ain't my child. My child would look amazing."
Who thinks people should stop doing orphan jokes? Type here so we can talk about it.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Why are half of the orphans blind? Because they can't find their parents.
My brother got his legs chopped off, but someone FBI opened my basement door, but it wasn't my brother because he died of starvation in the basement.