Family jokes
My fondest childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather. That is, until my mom took the urn away from me.
Just ask your dad.
If it’s called the “living room,” why did my grandma die there?
Why do orphans rob the bank?
Because they want to be wanted.
Where's your mom?
In the bin.
Brutha was caught lacking
Kylin fucks his sister.
My grandmother said goodnight...
She never said good morning.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
What’s the difference between a dad and a boomer age?
Why couldn’t the dwarf husband make his wife pregnant?
Because of his short cummings.
I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. I can't wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
I like my kids how I like my lights, Hanging from the ceiling.
Q: Why do orphans hate Fast and Furious movies?
A: Because they say "family" too often.
What's the difference between family and cats...
Cats won't abuse you at Christmas.
Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.
What's the difference between a happy family and a car guy? Only one has a family.
When your cousin dies and everybody thinks you're her.
FUCKING MENT
What's the difference between my mum and my dad?
My mum stayed.
My dad told me a story today. His mom, my grandma, said if a bird gets in your house, someone will die.
That day, a hummingbird got in his UPS truck, and that’s the day he found out that my grandma had cancer. 😭😭😭😭😭 6 weeks later, she died. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Why can't an orphan go to McDonald's? There's no point in the words "happy meal."