Family jokes
Why can't I be gay? I have nobody to call "daddy."
"I want to kill my family."
-realizes-
My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.
No, they will be wondering what I look like.
Why can orphans only have iPhone 13s?
Because there is no home button.
What did the orphan say to the adopter?
Nothing, he just stared.
You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.
The thing my mom birthed.
Why was the orphan so famous?
Because when they asked him go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home plate is.
Why can’t the orphan play baseball?
It can’t find home.
My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.
If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.
My mom is telling me to get off Friday Night Funkin' or she will slam my head against the keyboard: weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43.
Why can't orphans go to school?
They don't have a home to go to.
Orphanage kid: You’re ugly!
Kid with mother: Your mom!
Stop being disrespectful to all those people and their parents. Oh, I forgot, they don't have any parents.
I accidentally said, "Go cry to your mom," to an orphan. 😭
I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"
Hey, is anyone’s mom missing? Yeah, yours.
An orphan asked his caretaker where his parents are, and the caretaker said, "A place called home."
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
For he can be wanted.