Family jokes
Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful fuck just sat in his wheelchair and cried.
What do orphans be on Halloween?
They be themselves.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
If you are ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why don’t you peel a banana?
It’s too hard to kill your nana.
Can you relate
My sis a fat cow.
What is an orphan's favorite show?
Batman.
My sister just sits on the toilet with her iPad, then I go to do something at the sink and she says, "Bella, give me toilet paper!" Then I am annoyed, like super annoyed.
My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, "see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand." He said, "But Dad I'm blind." Exactly.
What's the best thing about an orphan GF?
You don't have to meet her parents.
Why can't orphans cross roads?
They don't have a parent to hold hands with.
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
A white guy was telling his friend about this girl he hooked up with. His friend asks, "Did you get her number?"
He replies, "No, but it's okay, I'll see her at the next family reunion!"
Why is the orphan so dumb?
Because he didn’t have parents to pay for it.
I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.
Kid: Why?
Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.
An orphan was running down the road. A car pulled up and said, "Get in." So the orphan got in and said, "Where are we going?" The kidnapper said, "I'm taking you to my house." The orphan replied, "OML, ARE YOU ADOPTING ME!?"
Today I asked my sis to take out the trash, and I shoved her outside!
Why is an orphan bad at hide-and-seek?
Because nobody will actually look for them.
What is the orphan's favorite toy from his parents?
They don’t have parents to pay for a toy.