Family jokes
My mom tells me to stop with the suicide jokes, and I replied with, "It's not that deep."
Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?
He is waiting for his dad with the milk.
Yo mama is so ugly that your dad has to be drunk to bring her home.
Father: I am taking your toys to the orphanage.
Son: Why?
Father: You’ll need them there.
Dad: What did you learn in school today?
Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
What’s an orphan's favorite Marvel film?
Spider-Man: Far From Home.
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
Yo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn’t fit.
Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
The apples get picked.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
What's the difference between an apple and a child?
The apple gets picked.
My mom asked me if I was okay, so I replied, "I will be," and jumped out the window!
Why do orphans cry at insurance places?
They got offered the family plan.
Why can't orphans go to the hospital? Because it is a family hospital. Sorry for the long break in between my jokes. I just had some family stuff, but I am back.
Yo mama so fat that Will Smith could slap her from a mile away.
Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.
A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂
Why do orphans prefer iPhones under the iPhone X? Because they have a home button.