Family jokes
Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!
A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.
What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.
Why do orphans work boomerangs?
Because it's the only thing that comes back.
Why can't orphans play at a McDonald's play place? They don't have parent supervision.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
It's not like they'll tell their parents.
One day, a girl was showering with her mom. She pointed at her mom's breasts and asked: "When can I get these?" Her mother replied: "In about 6 to 7 years when you grow up :)".
The other day, the girl's showering with her dad, and she pointed at his penis and asked: "When can I get this?" Her dad looked around and replied: "In about 20 minutes when your mom leaves the house."
A girl walks up to her dad to ask for a dress for prom and he says, "Suck my dick and I'll buy you a dress." She does it and says to him, "Dad, your dick tastes like shit." And he says, "Yeah, your brother wanted a car."
My family is like an apple tree. My sister is that ugly one that has to rot in.
When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.
You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!
What's the difference between Nemo and my dad?
Nemo was eventually found.
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers. : )
I told my orphan girlfriend that I had to grab milk. (Goes to the store, grabs milk.) As I grab the milk, I thought, "Hey, I bet I can repeat her life twice."
How to make an orphan's hands hurt: Make them clap their hands till their parents come back.
I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.
Are you depressed? Go punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Teacher: "I'll call your mother."
Orphan: "Go on, see if she picks up."
Why does an orphan always get out in baseball?
Because he can't run home.
What did the person say to the orphan?
"Where are your parents?"
What do orphans be on Halloween?
They be themselves.