Family jokes

As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers. : )

How to make an orphan's hands hurt: Make them clap their hands till their parents come back.

Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.

When my dad left, he said he would bring back the milk, but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him, and he said, "I used all the milk to make your sister."

Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?

I was reading the news and read that a kid killed his family, and when they interviewed him, he said he wanted to become Batman.

Why do orphans hate school?

No field trips. Parent signature_____________.

My life is so sad it's because you're in it.

What is an orphan's favorite song? "Lost Boy."

Lil Jimmy: Hey doc.

Doctor: Hi, sorry but I can’t see you anymore.

Lil Jimmy: Why?

Doctor: Because, Lil Jimmy, I’m a family doctor, you're an orphan.

Lil Jimmy: 👁👄👁🖕

I don't get it.

Orphans are very religious, well mostly. Statistics say that roughly 2/3 of the orphan population go to church. I mean it's the only place they can call someone "father".

Why do the twin towers and my mom have in common? They fell over.

Why can't an orphan go to a field trip?

Parent's signature: ___________

If you're bored, joke about an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Why do orphans have to have customized phones? Because there aren't home buttons.

What’s the difference between an orphan and a tomato?

The tomato gets picked.

Why does an orphan always get out in baseball?

Because he can't run home.

Why can't orphans play dodgeball? Because no one misses them.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

What do orphans be on Halloween?

They be themselves.