Family jokes
I saw an orphan in the grocery store and asked him, "Where's your mom?" and he cried. Why?
"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.
“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.
It's opposite day today. I'm gonna tell an orphan that their parents are here.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a tomato?
The tomato gets picked.
Little Johnny saw his dad getting head from his mom. Johnny asked what they were doing, and mom stopped and said she was fixing his dad's pants. Little Johnny says, "That explains what the lady next door was doing."
I told my mom to get rope for a project, and when she got home, I got the good old coat hanger out and hung myself up.
I tried to give directions to an orphan, but he got lost because there was no home.
Hey, my grandfather was part of WWII. Yeah. He killed Hitler!
What do you call an 18 year old orphan?
Homeless.
Why can't orphans play dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
What’s an orphan's favorite drink?
Fosters.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What do you call an orphan's family reunion?
Me time.
How did your dad come back with the milk? The Milky Way.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?... one gets picked.
I know 5 fat people, and your mama is 4 of them.
Why do orphans hate the color black? Because it reminds them of their dark history.
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?
Why can't an orphan go to a field trip?
Parent's signature: ___________