Family jokes
No one has my back like my dad.
Do you wanna know why orphans don’t play baseball?
They don’t know what home is.
What is a pirate's favorite letter? A letter from his family; he hadn't seen them in years.
Guy: Are you gay? I'm orphan.
Why do orphans like baseball so they can know what a real home is?
so true lol
I didn't put my kids up for adoption.
What's an orphan's favorite flower?
A self-raising flower.
Do you ever look at someone and think, "You must have been conceived at a family reunion"?
Mom: ON THE PHONE WITH CHILD- Honey, is Dad late to pick you up again?
Child: No, Mum. Dad is here, but he is talking about me to Mrs. Lili, the math teacher.
Mom: Can you hear them?
Child: I think... they are watching a good movie.
Mom: Why do you think that?
Child: Because I keep hearing this *HOLDS ONTO PHONE* and clap, clap, clap.
Your mum is so stupid, when she went on your phone it got fat.
Why are orphans not that good at baseball?
They can never hit a homerun.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.
Orphan: I finally have a father!
God: And who is that?
Orphan: You!
God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me.
Orphan: :l
Hey Evan, this is Dad. Ya, I’m still not home.
Say, "Moommy."
There is a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking; at least one of them does something.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They never can make it home.
Why don't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.
Why do orphans love playing baseball?
They can always run home.
Stop it with the "yo mama" jokes. They are just offensive.