Falling Off jokes
My uncle died from falling off a ladder and landing on his head (true story).
All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put my uncle together again.
How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.
Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She was born without arms.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Not Sally.
Yo mama is so fat, she falls off both sides of the bed.
What do you call it when a drunk cowgirl falls off her stool at the bar?
A hoedown.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
What does a French guy say when he falls off?
Oh no, Eiffel!
Why'd the girl fall off the swing?
'Cause she had no arms.
Knock, knock!! Who's there?
Not the girl.
Q. Why did the boy fall off his bike?
A. His mom threw an oven at him.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally drop a broom? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally go swimming? She didn't like not having arms.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally, she hasn't come back yet.
What do you get if a disabled person falls off a building? Mashed potatoes.
Me testing if there is fall damage in real life (falls off of a cliff, uses water bucket trick) dies.
Your forehead is so big, Humpty Dumpty didn’t want to fall off!
Your forehead is so big that when you put glasses on top of your head, it falls off.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.
Why did Joe get hit by a bus? Sally was driving it.
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
Yo mama is so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall.
Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not Susie.
Why do I love a block? Because I can fall off the stairs.
There are three people on the steps of Heaven. God tells them all he is having a good day and if they make him laugh by telling him how they died, he will let them in.
The first one said, "I just finished a long day of work and I get home, and right as I stepped in, I knew my wife was cheating on me. I searched everywhere and I couldn’t find anybody, so I got a drink and went to the balcony, and then I saw him, hanging off the ledge of the balcony. I kicked his hands, but he wouldn’t fall, so I threw a Refrigerator at him, and I fell with the Refrigerator."
God busted out laughing and let him in.
The next person walked up and God told him the same thing he told the other person. God told him that he didn’t think that he could make him laugh more than the first person. The second guy said, "So get this, I’m a window washer on the 8th floor. I’m washing the windows like normal, and this enraged psychopath walks up and starts kicking my hands, and then he throws a refrigerator at me and I die."
God bursts out laughing so much to where he falls off his chair, and he lets the guy through. The next guy comes up and God tells him the same thing he told the last two people, and he tells him that there is no way that he can make him laugh more than the other two did. So he starts talking. "So get this, I’m in a refrigerator..."