Hazard jokes

What do you call my brother in the water?

"Tsunami."

Why does everyone say there are mines in Bosnia? There are no-

I will remember my brother's last words: if you can't put a fork in a toaster, how about a spoon?

Are you acid, cause I want to throw [you] at my face?

I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.

I went scuba diving last year. It was fun, but at the end, I ran out of oxygen.

It was a breathtaking experience.

What's something red that is bad for your teeth?

A brick.

What Happens When You Get Caught On Fire?

— You Lost To Slmebody When You Were Playing Hide And Seek, And The Place Where You Got Caught Was Exactly On A Patch Of Fire.

What’s red and bad for your dental health? A brick.

What’s invisible and bad for you to breathe? Mustard gas.

What’s green and bad for you to drink? Radioactive waste.

God, you're more toxic than white phosphorus.

A father of five puts on a gas mask and a hazard suit and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked, "Dad, what are you wearing?"

The father answered with, "A costume for Halloween."

The child asked, "Can I join?" He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. After that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.

A friend of mine chews gum, lays back to yawn, then chokes on the gum. Then I said, "God, what, you choking on dick?"

What's brown and rather bad for your dental health?

- A baseball bat.

I fell down yesterday.

Why did the blind man fall into the well?

He couldn’t see that well.

Are you a toaster?

'Cause I wanna take a bath with you.

Health and safety tips: Looking at your hairline is hazardous. For your best interest, please look away.

You know stairs, right? The dark... My there is something. I know that if you fall down the stairs, your balls will be crushed!

What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?

A pool table.

I am the danger.