Failing jokes
What happens when you fail to be an emo? You don't make the cut.
When you fail art school.
Why did the orphan fail in baseball?
He couldn't find home.
Guy: Hey, Siri, I failed my final exams, can you cheer me up?
Siri: What’s the difference between you and your grandma? Your grandma passed!
Roses are red, I failed my test, All because of Hugh and his incest.
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it was made by the same company that made their life decisions.
I traveled through time to get my dad back.
I failed because I was 1e21 years off.
I beat up a failed musician until he started crying.
I thought a few hits would cheer him up!
When does a dyslexic person know when they've spelt their address wrong?
When it fails to turn up.
Blame Austria for creating Hitler, who we know today. He failed art school.
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
"BlessedBrian must be a SMOKE DETECTOR... because he never fails to kill the vibe."
What do feminists do when they fail at something?
Blame men for sexism and misogyny.
What’s red, slimy, and makes my wife scream? Two failed abortions!
"Oh, you’re still talking? I thought background noise was supposed to fade out after a while. Must be tough waking up every day knowing your personality was a failed experiment."
Why did the failed abortion climb up the woman’s leg?
It was homesick.
I bet Kobe failed flying school.
Hi, father, I failed the class, you mommy!
Wolf looks like a fox.
It has the sharpest claws.
It has a bushy tail.
To eat, it doesn't fail.
It has a coat of red.
My grandmother has said,
It hunts in search of food.
It is never, never good!
Teacher: Here, have candy.
Kid: No, I’m too fat.
Teacher: Shut up, or I’m gonna fail you.
*Next week*
Teacher: Okay kids, get off the floor and go back to your seats.
Kid: I’m too fat to get up.
Teacher: Don’t you remember what I said?
Kid: Yep, elephants don’t forget.