Failing Jokes

Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?

Because it was made by the same company that made their life decisions.

BlessedBrian must be a SMOKE DETECTOR... because he never fails to kill the vibe

i beat up a failed musician until he started crying. i thought a few hits would cheer him up!

I traveled through time to get my dad back.

I failed because I was 1e21 years off

When dose a dyslexic person no when they've spelt their address wrong when ordering online when It fails to turn up

Blame Austria for creating Hitler who we know today. He failed art school.

me when i failed my chem test

me looking at my test
grade thinking I ate when in
fact the test ate me
2006
CN
20

What’s red,slimy,and makes my wife scream? Two failed abortions!

Fill it out if u want

#THINGS I HAVE DONE PROJECT
O Been in Love
O Have Anxiety
O Broken Hearts
O Felt Insecure
O Been Ignored
O Been Embarrassed
O Stolen
O Lied
O Been Heartbroken
O Kissed
O Had a Boyfriend
O Had a Girlfriend
O Cheated
O Been Cheated On
O Had Sex
O Cried Myself to Sleep
O Stayed Up All Night
O Smiled
O Laughed
O Fake Smiled
O Been Verbally Abused
O Been Physically Abused
O Been Sexually Abused
O Hated Someone
O Hated Myself
O Gotten a Tattoo
O Gotten Piercings
O Traveled
O Been Stung
O Broken Bones
O Skipped School
O Want/Wanted to Die
O Been Depressed
O Binged
O Failed a Class
O Purged
O Starved
O Gotten All A's
O Gotten Suspended
O Gotten Expelled
O Been to Jail
O Been Cyber-bullied
O Been Bullied
O Been a Bully
O Have/Had Anorexia
O Have/Had Bulimia
O Cut Myself
O Burned Myself
O Drank
O Smoked
O Done Drugs
O Have/Had an Addiction
O One Month Clean
O Attempted Suicide
O Know Someone Who Has
O Lost Someone to Suicide
O Overdosed
O Hallucinated
O Been Hospitalized
O Seen a Therapist
O Told Your Parents
O Have Other Mental Disorders
O Have Other Medical Problems
O Take Meds
O Hide Scars wockalbin
O Have a Secret Account
O Relapsed
O Other Forms of Self-harm O Accepted Myself
@violetsunlight7

Why did the failed abortion climb up the woman’s leg?

It was homesick.

A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.

The physicist said, "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed."

The engineer said, "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong."

The programmer said, "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"

I bet kobee failed flying school

hi father i fail the class you mommy

Wolf looks like a fox It has the sharpest claws It has a bushy tail To eat it doesn't fail It has a coat of red My grandmother has said It hunts for search of food It is never never good

Teacher:here have candy Kid:no I’m too fat Teacher:shut up or I’m gonna fail u *next week* Teacher:ok kids get off the floor and go back to your seats Kid:I’m too fat to get up Teacher:don’t u remember what I said Kid:yep elephants don’t forget

I FUCKING FAILED THE FUCKING CHALLENGE. FUCK FUCK FUCK. FUCKKKKK

Epic fail moment

X ²
7:56 PM Sat Feb 4
Od
All Men
Are Pigs
Women
Are
Equal
To
Men
94%

These are ear-retcal jokes...

Fail

POV an Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid and the kidnapper called the kids mom then the mom said no its fine my kid got a b he failed and the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failiure