Entertainment jokes
Who is chicken's favorite actor?
James Cor-hen!
Why do women like Pac-Man so much?
How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?
When I was little, I used to think that the people in cartoons were real people...until I turned 7. I realized that it was just people doing voices. Sad, isn't it?
What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome trying to beat Minecraft?
“A sped runner.”
What did the lady say to Michael Jackson at the beach?
"Excuse me, you're in my sun (son)."
Good news, people! Michael Jackson is still alive. They found him hidden away in a goat pen with all the kids!
What's worse than ants in your pants?
Michael Jackson.
What are Michael Jackson's pronouns?
He, he.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite game? Jacks.
Why? He loved to play with the little balls.
What TV shows do orphans not like?
"Family Guy."
What's the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Chuck Norris once pissed in the tank of a semi as a joke.
It is now known as Optimus Prime.
Yo mama's so fat, she works in the movie theater as a screen.
If a clown farted, would it smell funny?
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says, "If I can surprise you, I get a free drink." The bartender was unsure but agreed.
The guy pulled a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket, and he starts to play.
The bartender was surprised and gave the guy a free drink.
The guy then says, "You see, I have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes. Can I get another free drink if you get a free wish?"
The bartender agrees without hesitation.
The bartender wishes for 1000 bucks, but he gets 1000 ducks.
"WTF!" the man shouts.
The guy answered, "Did you think I wanted a 30cm long pianist?"
A mushroom walked into a pub.
He asked the bartender to give him a beer.
The bartender said, "I can't, you'll get too rowdy."
The mushroom then said, "Oh come on! When I drink, I'm a fun guy!"
Vegan Teacher the musical.
Miss Kadie - "Oh no, you poor dead animal!"
Mr. Beast- 🎶 "You're a dumb Communist, Miss Kadie" 🎶
Chandler-🎵 "Yup, you're one high fluting son of a gun" 🎵
Mr. Beast- 🎵 "I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant" 🎵
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "Don't hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans 'R' us kid?" 🎵
Kids- 🎵 "We've had enough of your problems, Miss Kadie, you're such a commie!"
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "I just want to die because I'm so sad!"
- Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and commits suicide.
What's the opposite of Christopher Walken?
Christopher Reeve.
Yo mama so fat that when she walked past the TV, you missed 3 episodes of your favorite show.