Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? A bowling ball doesnt cry when you put your fingers in it.
Why did the cheese go to therapy? Because it had too many emotional holes.
What is the difference between hungry and horny? The cucumber goes to different places
It's better being depressed and suicidal than being happy, know why? Happiness never lasts forever.
nobody: aww thats so sad! me: just like me
*School shooting : Happens* Foreign Exchange Student: *Starts sobbing under desk* American Student: "First time?"
What’s it called when you give emo some rope as a present? Murder.
In preschool, I confessed my love to my crush, and she rejected me. As heartbroken as I was, I sucked it up and went back to teaching.
My parents found my yt channel I hate myself now and I'm emotional. = SELF HARM
I'm so depressed that when I smile my Face ID won't work.
I'm so depressed that when I smile, my Face ID doesn't recognize me.
Why are emo jokes so infamous?
They cut deep.
I cried when my dad cut up onions. Onions was a good dog.
Nana When Zane Kisses Her In Her Mind: [Insert Chiwawa Scream]
Imagine being depressed couldn’t be me
Why did the orphan rob the bank, Because he wanted to know what it felt like to be wanted.
I saw this one quote of the people who smile the most are covering the most pain I think this is true just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends but with my parents and family I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do. I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe 22/24 but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate saying I would tell her that my depression got worse she went along with it but I haven't told my mum and I know make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist
There are pain killers but they only relieve physical pain. I wish something could relieve my internal pain.
So do you guys know those waterslides that you stand in, and then they suddenly drop you straight down onto the water slide? If not, look them up on YouTube, there's nothing like them.
Ah yes, the sweet memories of my first time on one of these. I feel that my mental/emotional scars have healed enough to tell this gem.
At the time my girlfriend, now Fiancée, worked as a photographer for one of those resorts with the indoor and outdoor water parks. One of her perks was that her and a family member/friend could get into the waterpark for free, so one hot summer day she had off and we both decided it'd be fun to go there and cool down for the day.
While we were there, I discovered one of there most "Thrilling" looking waterslides. Basically you stand in this tube, and then the slide operator presses a button and this slide drops you straight down a good 90 FEET, before you actually start going down the water slide. Me, being a thrill seeker, of course had to try it. So I made the great climb up to the top of the slide, stood in line, and finally it was my turn. Once I got in the tube, the operator told me to keep my legs crossed. Now I'm a pretty big heavy guy, so I was like "That's uncomfortable as fuck, I'm not doing that". So there I was standing in the tube, having a panic attack from anticipation, with my legs not crossed. The operator finally presses the button, the bottom opens and I fall straight down the water slide. Very quickly I realized why they have you cross your legs. Water shot so far up my ass, so fast, I swear I tasted it in my mouth. My body raced down that slide, as I questioned every life choice that I have ever made.
Once I made it to the bottom, I sat there for a moment, absolutely violated. I felt like someone in an episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. I built up the courage to finally stand up, and all I could feel was the nice warm stream of water mixed with shit, and maybe a little bit of blood shoot out of my ass faster than the Steamboat Geyser at Yellowstone National Park. I quickly got off the slide and ran to the bathroom, with a trail of shitty water tailing me as the slide operator stared in awe. They had to shut down the slide for the rest of the day :'), but man was my asshole clean after that!
Moral of the story: Keep your damn legs crossed on waterslides.
Same thing goes when you are at bible study with a handsy priest.
i love u like my cuts deeply
