Education jokes
Why did the lonely fish get a detention? Because he left the school.
Braille is not that hard to learn, you just got to have a feel for it.
I live next to a kindergarten, and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.
What did the mermaid wear for math class?
Algaebra.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
Why did Helen Keller’s dog run away?
You’d run away too if your name was afjlkawihrs gdfn wjasidphbfvnas icxhuvbjsdlk m.nd;fuoxcghkfjckoSZ: lF,.XMAVUDOXICUGJNWLFXCMV CKLSAXHV IJADHXC;IVKSA.
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?
That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?
Because they have a home room.
What's the easiest way to get straight A's? Use a ruler.
My teachers told me I'd never amount to much because I procrastinate so much.
I told them, "Just you wait!"
Why did the orphan fail all his classes?
He couldn’t do his homework.
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Broken pencil.
Broken pencil who?
Never mind, it's pointless.
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
Imagine being expelled from school for bringing a weapon to school.
Quiet kid reaches down and class starts running.
Quiet kid: What's wrong? Pulling out my...
Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?
A: They're both cheesy.
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?