Education jokes
Teacher: What does the pig give us? Student: Bacon.
Teacher: Very good. How about the chicken? Student: Meat.
Teacher: Good, now what would a fat cow give you? Student: Homework.
Like if you like school (I mean if you don't)!
Teacher: What month is it?
Quiet kid: AUG-ust.
Classroom: Visible concern.
Your forehead is so big that teachers use it as a whiteboard.
Why are Americans so dumb?
Because they shoot the ones that go to school.
True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.
What's worse than having an honorary degree from Harvard? Being homeless and having an honorary degree from Harvard.
Why can an orphan not have homework? They do not have a home.
What brings kids to school every day?
A school bus 🚌.
When my mom said you have to listen to classical music at my new school, I had to listen to it twenty-four seven. After that, I sang the song [with] the wrong melody for my music teacher 😎
It was a sunny day and I was in school. I had history lessons and we had a cool subject! The subject was about Penaldo, the man who statpadded against small teams and camped in the pen spot! Our teacher showed us a map with marked countries in which Penaldo dived like a dolphin!
The teacher is asking you a question.
Teacher: "If your biggest dream came true, what would you be?"
Me: "Dead."
Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"
Kid: "A leopard."
Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."
Kid: "Broooooooooooo."
What's one piece of stationary gay kids always forget to bring to school? A ruler.
When you're in the middle of a test and you hear gun shots.
Teacher: “If you got ten dollars from ten people, what would you have?”
Johnny: “A new bike!”
My favorite joke was: what's the difference between a teacher and a train?
What's the worst place to teach an orphan? Homeschool.
What's America's no. 1 class?
Target practice.
Or is she asking her son, "Do you know Newton?"
The boy said, "No, I don't know."
She said to him, "If you had paid attention to your lessons, you would have known him!"
The boy said, "Ok, do you know Ikhlod?"
She said to him, "No, who is she?"
He said to her, "If you had paid attention to your husband, you would have known her."
The important thing is that the boy is currently a week with his uncles and a week with his turbans.