Education jokes
What's the easiest way to get straight A's? Use a ruler.
Why did the orphan fail all his classes?
He couldn’t do his homework.
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
Why did the girl bring the ladder to school? Because she wanted to go to high school.
Why don't teachers give orphans homework? Because they can't go home...
Memes
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
"Bill? Bill?" Bill hears faintly in the distance.
Bill Nye snapped back into reality only to find he had peed all over the set.
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?
That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
What do you call a bunch of retarded preschoolers? Tater tots.
"Alexa, open Kahoot!"
What was JFK's favorite school TV show?
BrainPop.
Teacher: Hi class, today we will learn about the song, "London Bridge is falling down, falling down."
Then one student said, "I thought it was 'Twin Towers are falling down, falling down!'"
What do you call a student in space?
An astrodent.
Where does the banana learn to split? At Sunday school.
Why did the lonely fish get a detention? Because he left the school.
Is that my student?
Na! It is Jesus!
Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?
Because they have a home room.
"Suck me off, daddy, I'm doing homework."
My teachers told me I'd never amount to much because I procrastinate so much.
I told them, "Just you wait!"
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.