One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.
She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, and we're both getting sent home from school because it's distracting to boys, apparently.
All school meeting introductions:
Grade School: “Welcome Girls and Boys!”
Middle School: “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome!”
High School: “Fingerers and fingerees.”
The 6th-grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?”
No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”
Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”
Little Mary’s mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, “Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!”
The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, “Anybody?”
Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, “The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.”
Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued.
“As for you, young lady, I have three things to say: One, you have a dirty mind. Two, you didn’t read your homework. And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”
Why didn't the bear go to college?
Because bears don't go to college.
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it would be a piece of cake! 🎂😂
Why did the teacher get arrested?
He gave the orphan homework!
My dad told me I'm a failure.
I failed a math test.
Good thing there's a pole outside my house.
What's 9 + 10?
21
Bin Laden’s kid comes sad from school.
“Dad, I got an F in Geography class!”
“Why is that?”
“The teacher asked me what’s the tallest building in New York and I said ‘Empire State Building.’”
Bin Laden waits a moment and then replies, “Let dad handle this one.”
What do you call it when school starts in Africa?
Black to school.
Me yelling every gay slur to get suspended.
I’m in catholic school.
Why did the math book kill itself?
It had too many problems.
What happened when the teacher tied all the students' shoe laces together?
They took a class trip.
Why do orphans hate geometry? Cuz it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
I got in trouble at school today because I told the teacher at school with COVID to stay positive.
You're so skinny that the professor thought you were the skeleton.
Mom asks, "Why are you are THIS show??? It's DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!"
The child says, "Don't you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?"
Mom whispers, "Oh, you DEAD."
I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A's instead of getting all the D's.
