Eating jokes
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
'Cause mommy never gave them some.
What's the difference between broccoli and a booger?
Kids won't eat broccoli.
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
My name is Caleb, and I like boo and eat it.
Why did the Orphan punch the other orphan?
Because the orphan broke his leg then had to get a retirement fund, so then he farted and got 1m dollars in cash, so then he started eating his toe jam and thought it tasted really good, so he started selling it to Taco Bell, then ate a cow. All the sudden he was attacked by hangry aliens then gave them some toe jam. They loved it, so they farted there way back up to space where they were eating Harold's fresh toe jam. It was so good, then one of the aliens ate there dog, so had to go the dollar tree to get it out then started gagging on one of the aliens' 2 meter defeater, and then the Orphan made out with the other Orphan and had a wedding at playground sharting happily ever after.
Josh Dalton once ate his shoulder.
Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."
Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"
"I know, you have a lot on your plate right now."
What did the dinosaur eat when the dentist fixed his tooth?
The dentist!
Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," says the first. "Moo!" says the second.
A young cowboy entered a seedy cafe in a small West Texas town.
He sat at the counter and spotted an elderly cowboy with his arms folded and his gaze fixed on a bowl of chili. After roughly 15 minutes of staring at it, the young cowboy boldly inquired, “If you’re not going to eat it, do you mind if I do?” Slowly turning his head toward the young wrangler, the older cowboy muttered, in his best cowboy voice, “Nah. Go ahead.”
The young cowboy eagerly reached over and slid the bowl over to his spot, spooning it in with glee. He was almost to the bottom when he noticed a rotten dead rat in the chili.
The sight was shocking, and he immediately upchucked the chili into the bowl. The old cowboy quietly said, “Yep, that’s as far as I got, too...”
You're like a cat, all you do is eat and sleep.
Do they say you are what you eat?
That makes Bulma a VEGETARIAN if u know what I'm SAIYAN.
How did Helen Keller get punished?
Her parents gave her a bomb and told her to eat it.
What's the worst thing about eating a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
What is a cannibal's favorite food?
Crackers.
What do Asian people eat?
Rice.
Why did the clock eat so fast?
He wanted to go in for SECONDS! Super bad, huh?
What's the difference between a baby and putty?
You can only eat one.
Your mum's vagina is so ravenous, that last night we both ended up on the living room floor, with her on top. She was eating my creamy young face off.